Creation and Marriage
Mark 10:1-12 NET.
1 Then Jesus left that place and went to the region of Judea and beyond the Jordan River. Again crowds gathered to him, and again, as was his custom, he taught them. 2 Then some Pharisees came, and to test him they asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” 3 He answered them, “What did Moses command you?” 4 They said, “Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of dismissal and to divorce her.” 5 But Jesus said to them, “He wrote this commandment for you because of your hard hearts. 6 But from the beginning of creation he made them male and female. 7 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother, 8 and the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer two, but one flesh. 9 Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” 10 In the house once again, the disciples asked him about this. 11 So he told them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her. 12 And if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.”
When we committed ourselves to reviewing and studying the commands of Christ in the Gospels, we all knew that we would come to some topics that were more controversial than others. There are subjects to which we will be more sensitive than others. We would probably be tempted to skip passages because dwelling on them might be painful or cause stress. But I have resisted that temptation because I believe this about our Lord. He never commanded anything that didn’t result in healing, not harm. He never gave any instruction designed to depress us or embarrass us. His purpose is always to help us, not hurt us.
For that reason, I was extra cautious when I approached today’s passage to study it again with the hope of expressing its message as a sermon about divorce and marriage. I prayed more as I prepared the sermon because I didn’t want to harm anyone. I wanted to heal. I believe what Jesus said in today’s text can heal our community, especially those hurt by divorce.
So, I ask those of you who might find today’s message offensive to hold off judgment until I come to the end. I am not singling out anybody. I don’t intend to call any names or to condemn anyone. I will share with you what our Savior says about this crucial issue. When we realize what Jesus said in today’s text, we will all understand that he only wants to heal our hurts and for us to live our best lives.
what people do (1-5).
People will do what they want, and if they can get other people to approve of what they do, they will ask for it. We see that in the question the Pharisees asked Jesus in today’s text. They came to him to test him. They wanted to know if he approved of a particular activity.
Historians tell us that there had been a sharp division among the Pharisees during this time over the issue of divorce. They were divided into two schools. One of the subjects that divided the two schools is that of divorce. Both schools accepted divorce as a reality. Both schools believed that divorcing was the prerogative of the husband and not the wife. They differed only on the justification for a man divorcing his wife. One school said that a man could divorce his wife for any reason. The other school insisted that a man could only divorce if his wife had an affair with another man.
But the question the Pharisees specifically asked Jesus that day was more general. They asked him, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” They wanted Jesus to rubber-stamp something that they were already doing. They wanted him to give his approval to something that they were already practicing. Essentially, they said, “Yes or No, Jesus, Do you approve of our behavior or disapprove of it?”
Jesus could have said “Yes” or “No” and walked away, but he didn’t. He didn’t respond that way because the subject was too complicated to be so answered. One of the problems with the modern church is that we tend to treat the subject differently than Jesus did. Sometimes, we use the very words of Jesus to accomplish something different than Jesus did in today’s text. The Pharisees asked if a divorce was lawful because all they were interested in was whether it was lawful. Often, the church decrees that divorce is sinful, disobedient, and wrong and effectively excommunicates or brands divorced people as damaged goods. When we do that, the church treats divorce differently than Jesus did in today’s text.
Jesus responded with another question. He asked those Pharisees a question that any Pharisee could have been able to answer immediately. He asked what the Law of Moses said on the subject of divorce. Their immediate reply was a quote from Deuteronomy 24, which said that if a man wanted to divorce his wife, he was responsible for writing a divorce certificate. That would allow the divorced wife to remarry. So, as far as the Law of Moses was concerned, any man could divorce. He just had to make sure his wife would have the legal ability to remarry.
But Jesus did not leave the matter there. The Pharisees were happy to get permission from him to do what they intended to do anyway. But Jesus knew that the issue was more complicated and more was at stake than something that a legal document could solve.
People of all ages and eras know this. They know that the government’s approval may solve some problems but not others. They know that separation from one’s spouse has lasting and harmful complications between the two and the children and grandchildren from the dissolved marriage. Divorce harms families and the communities they live in. That is why Jesus refused to allow a legal answer to be his last.
He said that the underlying problem was hard hearts. Pharaoh had a hard heart. God said, “Let my people go.” Pharaoh said no. God said, “Here’s a plague.” Pharoah said, OK, they can go. Then he changed his mind and said no again. God said, “Here’s another plague.” Pharoah said, OK, they can go. Then he changed his mind and said no again. Wash, rinse, repeat. A hard heart is a stubborn heart. A hard heart knows what God wants but refuses to give God what he wants.
what God wants (6-8).
Jesus explains that what God wants is shown by how he began this marriage thing in Eden. God made Adam; then he made Eve for Adam. He showed his love for them by giving them to each other. The picture we see in the first two chapters of Genesis is something that the theologians call the Edenic will of God. Adam and Eve’s relationship in the Garden (before sin) depicts what God wants for you and me and our relationships. He wants equality, unity, mutual appreciation, and reciprocal love.
Jesus had to go back to Eden because we have failed to live up to God’s ideal since then. He designed us with noticeable differences, but not so we could battle one another for domination. He wanted us to appreciate and enjoy the differences. He wanted our appreciation for one another to be one of the reasons we appreciate and worship Him.
God wants some fortunate men to find the women he has given them and fall in love with them and for those women fortunate enough to find a husband to do likewise. He wants us to leave our family ties and create new ones with the spouse he has given us. He wants our union to be more than legal. He wants it to be a one-flesh union.
He doesn’t want us to separate that union. To do so would be like amputating a limb. Amputation always causes pain, even if it is necessary. What the world seems to be telling us about marriage is that we should keep trying it until we get it right. That is not what God wants. He wants us to be committed to him together so much that we never allow our differences to destroy the gift that he has given to us in each other.
The world also seems to be telling us that it is OK to experiment on this whole marriage thing. For many generations, the world suggested that God was wrong about the idea of only one couple. It suggested that a man could marry as many women as his wallet could support. Thankfully, in most areas of the world today, that idea has been shown to be impractical. Polygamy was never God’s idea. Those passages of Scripture that reflect that societal norm also show how much hurt and dysfunction it can cause.
Today’s world seems to be telling us that it is OK to experiment on this whole marriage thing another way. It tells us that one man and one woman is an outdated concept. It says we should get with the program and acknowledge same-sex marriages. How do you answer suggestions like that? Well, for me, the answer is simple. In the beginning, it was not so. God’s plan for one man and woman is still his plan for making us happy, and our families and communities thrive. We cannot improve on God’s solution to human loneliness. The state may legally sanction a marriage between Adam and Steve, but God’s word still does not endorse it.
If we want to walk in God’s wisdom, we must resist the temptation to do something other than what he wants. It means a lot more than just honoring our covenants and staying married. But it never means anything less than that.
what people do (9-12).
We come to the final section of today’s passage and discover that, again, we are talking about the practice of divorcing. But the scene of the instruction changes here. Jesus concludes his discourse with the Pharisees by telling them that no man has any business separating what God has joined together. Then, the picture changes because the conversation changes. Instead of a public interrogation with the Pharisees, the scene now occurs in a private house. The conversation is between Jesus and his disciples.
The disciples still have some unanswered questions. They are trying to understand the implications of how Jesus answered the Pharisees. It seems Jesus wanted to go beyond simply answering the inquiry about whether divorce is permitted. He does, and so should we.
But listen carefully again to what Jesus tells his disciples in verse 11: “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her.” I want you to notice two things about this statement. Jesus zeroes in on the man who instigates the divorce, not the woman who is his victim. This guy intentionally divorces his wife so that he can marry another woman. The man is the criminal in this case, and the crime he commits is against his wife. This is revolutionary. In the culture in which Jesus and his disciples lived, adultery was always considered a crime against another man. If you had an affair with another man’s wife, your sin was adultery against her husband. If you had an affair with an unmarried woman, your sin was against her father or her future husband. But Jesus elevates the woman to the same status as the man. He still has in his mind the Edenic will of God. He sees adultery as an attack against the marriage partner and the sanctity of marriage itself.
Now, Jesus goes even further. In verse 12, he says that if the wife “divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.” In the Jewish culture, that could not happen because women could not initiate divorce. But in Greek and Roman culture, it happened all the time. Remember Herodias. She divorced her husband, Philip, and traded him for his brother, King Herod.
Jesus knew that in many ages, cultures, and societies (like our own), it would be possible and permitted for either party in a marriage to divorce their spouse because somebody else pleases them better. That is what he is talking about here with his disciples. He tells them it is not right because it produces a victim. It is not right because it is not in line with God’s Edenic will. The state may permit it, but it is not God’s purpose for marriage.
It is never too late for us to start doing marriage the way our Master intended it to work. God is the God who forgives and restores, and he is on the edge of his throne, waiting for us to ask him to restore our marriages. The question for all of us who are married is, are we looking for permission to bale, or are we looking for a plan to revive and restore the blessing God gave us?
God bless y’all and have a great marriage.
For further study:
Bowman John. The Gospel of Mark the New Christian Jewish Passover Haggadah. E. J. Brill 1997. pp. 208-211.
Branscomb, B. Harvie. The Gospel of Mark. London: Hodder and Stoughton, 1967. pp. 176-179.
Cole R. A. Mark: An Introduction and Commentary. 2nd ed. Inter-Varsity Press; Intervarsity Press 2008. p. 75; pp. 231-235.
Dowd Sharyn Echols. Reading Mark: A Literary and Theological Commentary on the Second Gospel. Smyth & Helwys 2000. pp. 98-103.
Garrett Greg and Matthew Paul Turner. The Voice of Mark: Let Them Listen; the Gospel of Mark Retold. Thomas Nelson 2008. pp. 62-63.
Hurtado Larry W. Mark. 1st ed. Harper & Row 1983. pp. 145-148.
Martin George. The Gospel According to Mark: Meaning and Message. Loyola Press 2005. pp. 247-252.
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